Все родители рано или поздно сталкиваются с проблемой выбора для своих детей высшего учебного заведения и, как следствие, будущей профессии. Пока ребёнок маленький, кажется, что впереди ещё масса времени и задумываться над тем, «куда же ему поступить» и «кем он у нас станет» рано. Но, как известно, время летит быстро, и вот уже перед вами выпускник 11го класса, а значит нужно определяться с будущей профессией. Так как же вести себя родителям? Ведь именно они должны помочь чаду с выбором жизненного пути. Каких ошибок избежать и как не навязывать своё мнение ребёнку? На эту тему рассуждает основатель и руководитель Школы эстетического воспитания Queen models studio kids Елена Шерипова.
Известный психолог Михаил Литвак в одной из своих работ сказал, что счастье — это максимальное развитие всех своих способностей и их реализация.
Реализация способностей вашего ребёнка, конечно, возможна не только в профессиональной деятельности; поэтому под поиском профессии стоит понимать нечто более обширное, чем подбор нужного вуза и вакансий. Думать о будущем стоит начинать как можно раньше. Добиться достойных результатов проще тем, чьи задатки и способности выявлены в детстве, когда мозг наиболее активен.
Но многие родители идут по одному и тому же пути, и допускают несколько ошибок, которые мешают ребёнку сделать правильный, а главное, осознанный выбор. Среди них такие фразы, как «Профессия — это на всю жизнь! Престижная профессия — это круто!» Ни вы, ни тем более ваш ребёнок, не можете знать, что приготовила вам жизнь. Бросаться такими заявлениями в 21м веке не правильно. Посмотрите вокруг, сколько человек из ваших знакомых работают по специальности? Где лежат их красные дипломы не самых плохих ВУЗов? И что такое престижная профессия? Престижная для кого и в чьих глазах? Есть востребованные специальности, это другое дело. И как раз задача родителей сориентировать ребёнка на рынке труда. Но это всё потом. Первым делом надо понять, что ребёнку нравится и на что он способен. Не надо навязывать вашему сыну или дочери то, что не получилось когда-то у вас. Даже в тех семьях, где из поколения в поколение передаётся специальность, например, врача или военного, иногда бывают «отклонения от схемы». И это нормально.
Так как же помочь ребёнку с выбором? С чего начать?
Необходимо выбирать не образовательные возможности, а будущее дело. Образование — ключ, а не дверь. Правильно выбранная профессия — это совокупность «хочу, могу и надо». Между этими тремя составляющими и необходимо искать баланс. Определите, что любит ваш ребенок и что для него важно (его желания и интересы), оцените сильные и слабые стороны (его способности и таланты).
Затем определите кластер профессий и соберите о них больше информации. Дайте ребёнку возможность попробовать силы в данной профессии. Естественно, мы говорим о выпускных классах и возрасте 16-17 лет.
Стоит помнить, что выбор жизненного пути зависит не только от способностей, задатков и умений, но и от характеристик мышления: как ребенок думает, как решает задачи, относится к трудностям. Неплохо бы на этапе выбора обратиться за консультацией к психологу, он поможет ребёнку разобраться в себе, избавиться от страхов и сомнений, мешающих формированию здоровой личности.
Полезным будет пройти профориентационное тестирование, оно позволяет ребёнку спокойно разобраться в своих интересах. Такие тесты призваны помочь посмотреть на себя со стороны, ответить самому себе, к каким занятиям его тянет больше.
Будучи в старших классах, школьники весьма абстрактно представляют себе некоторые специальности. Помочь ребенку разобраться, что к чему помогает метод кейсов — техника обучения, использующая описание реальных экономических, социальных и бизнес-ситуаций.
Также не стоит игнорировать тот факт, что ваш ребенок может любить и успевать разное, например, одновременно разбираться в физике и играть на гитаре. Поэтому не ограничивайте его интересы, объясняя это тем, что занятия музыкой будут отвлекать его от «более важной» науки.
Родители должны понять, что детям с раннего возраста необходимо учится объективно оценивать свои желания, возможности и мир вокруг. Важно помнить, что профессия необязательно выбирается на всю жизнь. Самое главное, чтобы ребенок научился понимать себя, знал, чего хочет, мог быстро решать задачи, был мобильным и готовым обучаться новому. Такой человек будет востребован всегда.
Основное условие для правильного выбора профессии – самостоятельность молодого человека. Нельзя решать этот вопрос вместо него, надо, чтобы он сознательно относился к выбору профессии, чувствовал ответственность за свое решение. Однако из этого не следует, что можно пустить дело на самотек. Необходимо, чтобы взрослые люди, в первую очередь родители, используя прямые и косвенные возможности, как можно больше помогали молодежи в этом вопросе. Подростка следует готовить к выбору профессии. Для этого родителям надо научить ребенка выполнять личные программы самовоспитания и саморазвития. Чтобы серьезно помочь молодому человеку в решении этой проблемы, в ней надо хорошо разобраться, и в первую очередь знать, какие черты его характера соответствуют той или иной профессии.
Знание своих возможностей и их правильная оценка являются сложной задачей для подростка, ибо выбор профессии происходит в период не завершившегося развития личности, когда она может претерпевать еще различные изменения. Трудно сказать, какие из имеющихся в этом возрасте качеств являются преходящими, присущими только этому возрасту, какие возникли под влиянием среды, а какие уже сложились и являются окончательными.
Оценивая индивидуальные особенности ребенка, решающее значение приобретает вопрос о том, каким образом при выборе профессии наиболее реально и многостороyне определить его личностные данные, при этом исключив возможность предвзятого мнения родителей и воспитателей.
Наиболее приемлемым является способ наблюдения. У каждой семьи есть большие возможности для того, чтобы с необходимым вниманием наблюдать за подростком, учитывая каждый критический момент, и на этой основе с точки зрения выбора профессии составить картину о характере развития индивидуальных особенностей подростка.
Результаты наблюдений можно объективно проконтролировать, если подвергнуть испытанию свои представления о ребенке, о его способностях, о воле и выдержке. Для этого надо поставить ряд реальных задач.
Родителям зачастую тяжело ставить свое дитя в условия испытания. Трудно, например, отпустить подростка даже в хорошо подготовленное самостоятельное путешествие. Родители при этом думают: если в семье он ведет себя несмело, робко, пассивно, то, оказавшись один, без родных, он проявит ненужную активность и самостоятельность. Но в результате таких испытаний очень часто у подростка возникают совершенно новые черты характера, которые оказывают решающее влияние на формирование его личности.
Чтобы решать проблемы подросткового возраста, родители должны находить поводы для основательных бесед по душам. Конечно, беседы о выборе профессии не являются обязательной программой для той семьи, в которой ребенок живет содержательной жизнью, а подобные беседы – естественное и постоянное явление, характерное для сплоченной и дружной семьи.
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